Don’t Be Silly, Wrap Up Your Willie. Oh, and win a free trip to #BiSC in Vegas, too.

I have yet to talk about sex on this blog but there is a first for everything. And what better way to take my blog’s virginity than talking about safe sex. (HI MOM!)

As you may recall, I recently returned from Bloggers in Sin City, where I was in the city of Sex and Sin’s with 59 other bloggers.  It has become an annual event and highlight of my year and I wouldn’t dare miss it. We have a ton of awesome sponsors each year, and one of them from 2012 is beyond amazing! The Lucky Bloke – an international condom company is teaming up with BiSC to give away… you ready? It’s pretty legend… wait for it… Keep it in your pants… dary!  That’s right, they are giving away A free spot to BiSC 2013 to one lucky winner!

Okay, so let’s get down to business. Did you know that condom’s come in 3 sizes? Small, Medium & Large (not just regular and magnum). You wouldn’t wear the wrong size shoe yet, you might be wearing the wrong size condom.  Well maybe you would wear the wrong shoe size. You know what they say about that… Anyways, The website  can help you determine your size.  Another great feature to the site, when you order online, the package comes in an unlabeled discreet box so no one will know you just ordered 500 condoms.

Did you know that The Lucky Bloke is that it is an international company? That means you can choose from international brands! Not just the usual Durex or Trojan that you’re used to. Isn’t sex more fun when you try new things?!

Top 10 phrases to help you remember the importance of safe sex:

  1. If you think she’s spunky, cover your monkey
  2. Don’t be a Schmuck. Protect your Puck!*
  3. If you can’t shield your rocket, leave it in your pocket
  4. No glove, no love
  5. Don’t surprise her, plug your Geyser
  6. Don’t be a fool, cover your tool 

  7. Wrap your bait, before you mate 

  8. Cover your pipe, you dumb ass wipe
  9. Got no protection? Can’t use your erection! 

  10. Holster your gun then shooting is more fun

Be sure to check out The Lucky Bloke’s website. They offer two options that will please you:

1. Lucky Bloke Pleasure Packs ~ the Ultimate Pleasure Subscription
A monthly subscription box filled with high-end sensual treats, including everything from aphrodisiac chocolates to luxurious massage oils. Each delivery will be filled with a selection of internationally curated treasures that are a perfect addition to your sexy arsenal!

2. Lucky Bloke: the Ultimate Condom Subscription Service
Their flagship site offers a carefully researched and hand-selected assortment of the very best international condoms and lubricants for both one-time and recurring delivery. International shipping is only $2.50 and 10% of all sales go to urgent humanitarian causes. Yeah, you read that right. The Lucky Bloke even donates to charities. So subscribe, have all the safe sex you want AND give back to the community! Have sex and save the world! Everybody wins!

Not only can The Lucky Bloke help you explore adult goodies and help you practice safe sex, they also will pay the way for someone, maybe you, hopefully me, to have a free trip to BiSC 2013. Don’t forget to follow The Lucky Bloke on Twitter and like them on Facebook. Not your typical condom company, eh?  Check the BiSC blog for more details on the BiSC spot giveaway rules.

Now, who is going to get LUCKY!?! ( I hope it is me! )

*This one was mine!


**Update – so who got lucky? I DID! I GOT LUCKY! HOLY FREAKIN’ COW! EEEKKSS!! Seriously, ALL EXCLAMATION POINTS HAPPY RIGHT NOW! I am absolutely beside myself with SO MUCH EXCITEMENT AND JOY and HOLY MOLY, the universe IS listening to ‘The Year of Caryn.” Is it May 2013 yet? When Melissa at The Lucky Bloke called me I was skyping with Terra and she got to watch the whole thing go down and watch me be a total fool screaming OMG! OMG! OMG! Seriously, I screamed. I am so glad that I got to share that moment with her. My voice still hurts. Thank you times a million to The Lucky Bloke. I can’t wait for May!